Prayer as Conversion
February 28, 1993
Brother John Raymond
We often speak of prayer as if we have been praying for ages.
What about the beginner? What about those who have recently turned
to the Lord? Prayer is a relationship with God not just the words we
pray to Him. On different occasions Jesus referred to this idea. He
corrected the Scribes and Pharisees by saying that they only honored
Him with their lips but that their hearts were far from Him. (Matt.
15:8) On another occasion Jesus mentioned that one should first be
reconciled with one's neighbor before offering one's gifts at the
altar. (Matt. 5:23,24) What does all this mean? It means that one's
relationship to God in prayer is affected by one's deeds outside of
prayer. Or to put it in Our Lord's words - "if you love Me keep My
Commandments." (John 14:15)
Precisely because prayer is a relationship one must detach
oneself from sin in order to pray well. The sins most devastating to
one's prayer life are mortal sins. By these sins one willfully
offends God and severs the relationship with Him. How can one enter
into a relationship with someone whom one has willfully hurt? So the
beginning stage of a prayer life for those with mortal sins must be
one of repentance. One must, by a good Confession, first repair
one's relationship with God. One's prayer at this time should be one
of sincerity to God acknowledging one's area of weakness and asking
for His help especially when tempted. One should ask others for
prayers during this time of conversion. God will help to draw one's
heart away from sin and back toward Himself. Remember the Parable of
the Prodigal Son? If one humbles oneself before God He will shower
His consolations upon them.
Conversion, then, is the beginning of a life of prayer. God
begins to draw the soul away from sin and to Himself. He does this
by what is called by spiritual authors - consolations. When one
prays to God one feels a delight in the senses such as a warm
feeling, great fervor, visions, etc. These are all candy from God to
turn one's heart toward Him. It's like showering gifts upon someone
to attract their attention. The beginner at prayer finds himself
experiencing greater delight in praying to and serving God than in
his former sinfulness. Thus, little by little, the person detaches
himself from sin and begins to cling to God. Serious sins become a
thing of the past.
The important thing I wish to express here is to encourage people
to begin the journey of prayer. Begin with a good Confession and
then nuture one's soul by reading the Holy Bible, praying the Holy
Rosary, attending Holy Mass, avoiding occasions of sin - in short,
make an effort to remain in God's grace. Then, and only then, can
one begin a journey of prayer, a relationship with God.