Dryness in Prayer
March 28, 1993
Brother John Raymond
You may have read about or heard of certain stages in prayer. I
would like to talk about what is perhaps the second stage a person
enters into as he progresses in prayer.
Prayer is more than just words - it involves our whole
relationship with God. Just as in any relationship the intimacy
between two people takes time to grow. In the case of our
relationship with God it is only our response to God's love that
needs growth. God helps us in the beginning of our relationship with
Him by drawing us to Himself through many consolations during our
prayer. We pray to God and enjoy the consolations we receive from
Him. God showers us with these consolations to form in us the habit
of prayer.
Once we are firmly rooted in a life of prayer God sometimes
withdraws these sensible consolations. Perhaps we have become use to
them. We begin to feel like a "cold stone" when we try to pray. This
dryness or loss of feelings we experience may even carry over into
our charitable works. Some may experience other difficulties when
praying. The first thought (though it's incorrect) that comes to
many people when this happens is that they have done something wrong
and therefore God has abandoned them. Yet when they examine
themselves they cannot find any serious violations of His Law. This
experience of dryness can be very painful. It can be even more
painful if one was very attached to the former feelings of
consolation.
What is happening? God is purifying our love for Him. We are now
asked to pray and serve Him with higher motives than before. Our
relationship with God becomes less of a "what I'm getting out of it"
attitude. Then we'll grow in humility before God. We realize just
how much we depend on Him for everything - even prayer. Thus this
seemingly negative experience in prayer helps us to grow in a
positive way.
Some people, however, turn back in their relationship with God at
this point. They give up their daily prayers. Their "motive" for
prayer is gone and so they give up. Others may not give up prayer
altogether but cut down on the amount of time they used to spend in
prayer. This is a sad mistake.
If we accept this new situation in our relationship with God and
do not panic we actually will suffer less. After some time we will
notice a deeper level of love for God developing. We will again
"want" to pray regardless of what we "experience" while praying.
Just to spend time with God will be our delight.
We have to remain faithful to this relationship of prayer with
God. Perhaps the only thing we are able to do during prayer is say
to God "here I am." But God, Who looks at the heart, knows our
intentions and is pleased with us.
When we arrive at a type of prayer where we are just happy to be
in God's presence we have arrived at what spiritual authors call the
Prayer of Simple Regard or a stage of prayer which involves a "look
of love," a simple gazing upon God. Our will is attached to God and
we are happy to just sit in His presence. St. John Vianney tells
about a man who used to a lot of time before Our Lord present in the
tabernacle of the church. One day St. John Vianney asked the man
what he did during this time. The man responded, "I look at Him and
He looks at me." In other words this man was experiencing this form
of prayer.
I wish to point out that often spiritual writers are speaking
about the stages of prayer that many people pass through. This does
not mean that everyone travels by this path in their life of prayer.
As the Benedictine, Father John Chapman stated, "Pray as you can,
not as you can't." But for those who are experiencing dryness in
prayer I hope and pray that they may persevere on the path they have
begun. A path that will lead to a more intimate prayer-life with
God.